nostalgia
feeling rather nostalgic.never thought friendster could make me feel that way.
sometimes i wished i wasnt what i am now.mebbe this is what they call an "identity crisis" that an adolesence experiences.in search of one's true self.sometimes i wished i was smarter or that i was more compassionate,kinder.sometimes i wished i knew what i wanted to achieve in life.do i want to be a lawyer?an executive striving to reach the top of the corporate ladder?i confuse myself at times.sometimes i dont even recognise the person that i am.
why do i even feel this way?i never even used to care.why cant i just go back to my old self?the real me?where nothing really bothered me as much.where i often was in a world of my own.where nothing could really upset me.where life wasnt as interesting or eventful.but it was simple and everything else was easy to decipher.
or is this what i really am?mebbe its the stress from the exams that's making me feel this way.it might be the absence of my family.
i just want to me.to be known and loved for the real me.is that too hard to be granted?but how is that to happen if i dont even know for sure what i am?
i just want to have my papa right here with me.he doesnt even have to say a word.just his presence can make me feel like im the most important girl in the whole wide world.i want him here to por me.
i never have thought coming to study here on my own would be as tough as it is getting.plus the fact that i havent been home a whole seven months.i always thought i was very independent.tough as a cookie.guess im not really.otherwise i wont be complaining about it in my blog.
u can roughly tell from the way i blog.my entries never used to so personal and depressing.it used to be about the movies i just watched.or about an interesting episode of my life in melbourne where everyone's oh-so-friendly.
oh well,who's to say that people dont change.mebbe i just learnt it the hard way.now that sounded cynical eh?
sometimes i wished i wasnt what i am now.mebbe this is what they call an "identity crisis" that an adolesence experiences.in search of one's true self.sometimes i wished i was smarter or that i was more compassionate,kinder.sometimes i wished i knew what i wanted to achieve in life.do i want to be a lawyer?an executive striving to reach the top of the corporate ladder?i confuse myself at times.sometimes i dont even recognise the person that i am.
why do i even feel this way?i never even used to care.why cant i just go back to my old self?the real me?where nothing really bothered me as much.where i often was in a world of my own.where nothing could really upset me.where life wasnt as interesting or eventful.but it was simple and everything else was easy to decipher.
or is this what i really am?mebbe its the stress from the exams that's making me feel this way.it might be the absence of my family.
i just want to me.to be known and loved for the real me.is that too hard to be granted?but how is that to happen if i dont even know for sure what i am?
i just want to have my papa right here with me.he doesnt even have to say a word.just his presence can make me feel like im the most important girl in the whole wide world.i want him here to por me.
i never have thought coming to study here on my own would be as tough as it is getting.plus the fact that i havent been home a whole seven months.i always thought i was very independent.tough as a cookie.guess im not really.otherwise i wont be complaining about it in my blog.
u can roughly tell from the way i blog.my entries never used to so personal and depressing.it used to be about the movies i just watched.or about an interesting episode of my life in melbourne where everyone's oh-so-friendly.
oh well,who's to say that people dont change.mebbe i just learnt it the hard way.now that sounded cynical eh?
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